HIS WORD IN THE WORLD!
MORE ON COPING WITH DEPRESSION AND LONELINESS AS A CHRISTIAN BELIEVER!(MATT.28:20) [PART TWO]
Remember, I said I am on a very familiar territory...and without exaggeration, I have spent the better part of my life. It's a place I hate to be in,but mostly always find myself in.
Even now,as I write this...even right this moment,my inner man is weeping profusely,while I struggle to present an outward false facade. I said in the first part that you can be surrounded with people that care,and yet suffer loneliness and depression.
Born an introvert,in my hay days,I can be by myself for weeks in a house if every supply is available...my most favourable companions being anything sentimental music,novels and poetry, especially when it borders on dirges. AND I TRIED TO *EXTROVERT* MYSELF WITH ALCOHOL IN MY TEENAGE YEARS. And that's where my self destruction began. At 16, I was a confirmed alcoholic, trying to prove myself to those who don't even want it. VERY BRILLIANT IN MY STUDIES(ONE OF THE BEST THROUGHOUT EVERY CLASS AND HALL I SAT IN), YET, I WAS HAUNTED BY LOW SELF ESTEEM.
As at this time,my calling was evident,though still a church goer then...and I was running away from it. You see,I grew up witnessing tragedy upon tragedy,losing the people that matter to me,one after the other...and falling from a comfortable city life down to a village hustler. And this past has stuck with me made worse by the continuation of these misfortunes, even long after I have answered the call.
The reality of my aloneness hit me like a punch,when it seems I never can get anything right,being alone became my permanent new normal. I suddenly felt more excruciatingly isolated than ever before, as if I had been dropped off on another planet and left there to figure out how to survive. All alone with no escape.
I'm writing this as a minister of the Gospel and I'm not proud to say that I'm yet emotionally stricken with the excruciating battles I face daily,even now. WHAT MAKES ME WANTING TO BE ALONE TO BEMOAN MY WOES, IS THAT NO ONE IS WILLING TO TRY UNDERSTAND HOW I FEEL. On a more sincere note, I see myself as selfish and self-centered,vainly wishing everything to revolve around me.
And I don't want to be seen as selfish and self-centered, courtesy of being misunderstood. To be in the position of the comforter is great and grand,when contrasted with being the COMFORTED!
AND THE ONLY WAY TO COME OUT IS. THE GOD WAY...HIS WORD AND FAITH IN HIS WORD. BEING DEPRESSED AND LONELY DOESN'T MAKE YOU LEPROUS,RATHER,IT SHOWS YOUR VULNERABILITY AS A MERE HUMAN WITH FLESH AND BLOOD, PROBABLY ON THE WRONG SIDE OF LIFE FOR SOME REASONS. *AND YOU'RE NOT IRREDEEMABLE* YOU'VE ALL IT TAKES TO BOUNCE BACK IN GOD'S WORD. WHAT WE ACTUALLY NEED IS FOR PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY SELF-RIGHTEOUS CHRISTIANS AND PASTORS TO LOOK DEEPER, BENEATH THE SURFACE. CONSCIOUSLY TRY TO WEAR THE SUFFERER'S SHOES,AND WE WILL DISCOVER THERE'S A LESS NEED TO CRITICIZE AND CONDEMN.
Scripture gives plenty of examples of people who shared these same painful feelings and realities. In fact, all of the Psalms point to evidence that even King David felt lonely quite often. Yet his loneliness is exactly what drove him to lean unto God. And this is the format that has kept me going..."that God hasn't said NO to me."
16. Turn thee unto me, and have mercy upon me; for I am desolate and afflicted.
17. The troubles of my heart are enlarged: O bring thou me out of my distresses.
18. Look upon mine affliction and my pain; and forgive all my sins.
19. Consider mine enemies; for they are many; and they hate me with cruel hatred.
20. O keep my soul, and deliver me: let me not be ashamed; for I put my trust in thee. (Psa 25: 16-20)
This whole passage is a series of pleas for God’s help because David felt oppressed, depressed, troubled, unseen and deserted by God and others … painfully alone.
The question is,"Where there not people around him?" Of course yes,but he was still depressed, mentally afflicted and lonely... alone in his inner sufferings...because,he felt misunderstood by men,hence he cried out to God!
But, unlike most of us
(me),instead of staying upset with God, David’s prayer takes a twist.(for me,not really upset with God,but rather disappointed in myself, knowing the Truth,but lazily unwilling to walk and work with it, until each time, reminded by FATHER),
I often wondered if he paused, slumped his shoulders and breathed a heavy sigh as he humbly uttered the words;
20. O keep my soul, and deliver me: let me not be ashamed; for I put my trust in thee.
21. Let integrity and uprightness preserve me; for I wait on thee. (Psa 25: 20-21)
Despite everything, King David leaned unto the Lord in his darkest moments instead of staying away from Him(like me...like most of us). Despite how alone he felt, David wanted to connect with God and held on to the hope that He was there, even if no one else was.
And this is where we miss it. Because we're misunderstood by people,we simply resigned ourselves to our so-called "fate," that God misunderstands us as well(an aberration,yes, undermining God's Omniscience attribute). Really very dangerous a thing to ever imagine;
It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. (Lam 3: 22)
You see, loneliness can actually be a catalyst to grow our relationship with God rather than stifle it. Loneliness is God’s way of reminding us we were made for a personal relationship with Him, and He placed a deep longing in our hearts only He can satisfy.
Maybe you've this feeling of loneliness because of the loss of a spouse from separation, divorce or even death. Maybe it’s because of an empty nest, an empty spot at the table, the loss of friends, or attending holidays, weddings or social events solo in a new season of life. It can even sometimes feel the strongest when we’re in a crowded room or with a spouse who makes us feel invisible or unimportant even when in their presence, proving loneliness is a state of mind, not a state of a being.
(For me, the latter is the ultimate TRUTH...a state of mind...a negative minded introvert,who because of scars after scars, acquired years after years,believes "NOTHING GOOD CAN COME OUT OF NAZARETH" A lie from the the very depths of the pit of hell)
At this point,we are blinded by our miseries, unwilling to see the devil slowly but decisively trying to scheme us out of God's eternal joy for us;
For I am conscious of my thoughts about you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you hope at the end. (Jer 29: 11)
So,regardless of the root of our loneliness, we can always trust that God is with us. As we lean onto Him, we can continue to pray that He will bring the right people into our lives and satisfy our need for human connection and understanding as He satisfies our soul’s thirst for Him.
AN IMPORTANT ADDITION HERE IS THAT,WE SHOULD ALSO DETERMINEDLY ENDEAVOUR TO MAKE OURSELVES LESS OF A BURDEN TO GOD AND THOSE AROUND US,IN OUR TRYING TIMES... YOU MAY BE SURPRISED I INCLUDED*GOD!* YES, GOD HAS EMOTIONS,JUST LIKE US... REMEMBER,WE ARE MADE IN HIS IMAGE...SO,HE HURTS TOO,WHEN WE MISUNDERSTAND HIM!
Connect with God first, and the rest will eventually fall into place. God may not take away the LONELINESS, but as we put our hope in HIM like David did, GOD will make sure we feel HIS NEARNESS.
Come to me, all you who are troubled and weighted down with care, and I will give you rest. (Mat 11: 28)
Teaching them to keep all the rules which I have given you: and see, I am ever with you, even to the end of the world. (Mat 28: 20)
Join me if you're in the same boat with me;
Lord, I feel so alone right now. Hear my pleas; help me feel Your nearness as You divinely work to impute Your Joy into my life,as you take away the misplaced heaviness in my heart . In Christ Jesus’ Name, Amen.!
HIS WORD IN THE WORLD!
🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥
MORE ON COPING WITH DEPRESSION AND LONELINESS AS A CHRISTIAN BELIEVER!(MATT.28:20) [PART TWO]
🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥🚥
Remember, I said I am on a very familiar territory...and without exaggeration, I have spent the better part of my life. It's a place I hate to be in,but mostly always find myself in.
Even now,as I write this...even right this moment,my inner man is weeping profusely,while I struggle to present an outward false facade. I said in the first part that you can be surrounded with people that care,and yet suffer loneliness and depression.
Born an introvert,in my hay days,I can be by myself for weeks in a house if every supply is available...my most favourable companions being anything sentimental music,novels and poetry, especially when it borders on dirges. AND I TRIED TO *EXTROVERT* MYSELF WITH ALCOHOL IN MY TEENAGE YEARS. And that's where my self destruction began. At 16, I was a confirmed alcoholic, trying to prove myself to those who don't even want it. VERY BRILLIANT IN MY STUDIES(ONE OF THE BEST THROUGHOUT EVERY CLASS AND HALL I SAT IN), YET, I WAS HAUNTED BY LOW SELF ESTEEM.
As at this time,my calling was evident,though still a church goer then...and I was running away from it. You see,I grew up witnessing tragedy upon tragedy,losing the people that matter to me,one after the other...and falling from a comfortable city life down to a village hustler. And this past has stuck with me made worse by the continuation of these misfortunes, even long after I have answered the call.
The reality of my aloneness hit me like a punch,when it seems I never can get anything right,being alone became my permanent new normal. I suddenly felt more excruciatingly isolated than ever before, as if I had been dropped off on another planet and left there to figure out how to survive. All alone with no escape.
I'm writing this as a minister of the Gospel and I'm not proud to say that I'm yet emotionally stricken with the excruciating battles I face daily,even now. WHAT MAKES ME WANTING TO BE ALONE TO BEMOAN MY WOES, IS THAT NO ONE IS WILLING TO TRY UNDERSTAND HOW I FEEL. On a more sincere note, I see myself as selfish and self-centered,vainly wishing everything to revolve around me.
And I don't want to be seen as selfish and self-centered, courtesy of being misunderstood. To be in the position of the comforter is great and grand,when contrasted with being the COMFORTED!
AND THE ONLY WAY TO COME OUT IS. THE GOD WAY...HIS WORD AND FAITH IN HIS WORD. BEING DEPRESSED AND LONELY DOESN'T MAKE YOU LEPROUS,RATHER,IT SHOWS YOUR VULNERABILITY AS A MERE HUMAN WITH FLESH AND BLOOD, PROBABLY ON THE WRONG SIDE OF LIFE FOR SOME REASONS. *AND YOU'RE NOT IRREDEEMABLE* YOU'VE ALL IT TAKES TO BOUNCE BACK IN GOD'S WORD. WHAT WE ACTUALLY NEED IS FOR PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY SELF-RIGHTEOUS CHRISTIANS AND PASTORS TO LOOK DEEPER, BENEATH THE SURFACE. CONSCIOUSLY TRY TO WEAR THE SUFFERER'S SHOES,AND WE WILL DISCOVER THERE'S A LESS NEED TO CRITICIZE AND CONDEMN.
Scripture gives plenty of examples of people who shared these same painful feelings and realities. In fact, all of the Psalms point to evidence that even King David felt lonely quite often. Yet his loneliness is exactly what drove him to lean unto God. And this is the format that has kept me going..."that God hasn't said NO to me."
16. Turn thee unto me, and have mercy upon me; for I am desolate and afflicted.
17. The troubles of my heart are enlarged: O bring thou me out of my distresses.
18. Look upon mine affliction and my pain; and forgive all my sins.
19. Consider mine enemies; for they are many; and they hate me with cruel hatred.
20. O keep my soul, and deliver me: let me not be ashamed; for I put my trust in thee. (Psa 25: 16-20)
This whole passage is a series of pleas for God’s help because David felt oppressed, depressed, troubled, unseen and deserted by God and others … painfully alone.
The question is,"Where there not people around him?" Of course yes,but he was still depressed, mentally afflicted and lonely... alone in his inner sufferings...because,he felt misunderstood by men,hence he cried out to God!
But, unlike most of us
(me),instead of staying upset with God, David’s prayer takes a twist.(for me,not really upset with God,but rather disappointed in myself, knowing the Truth,but lazily unwilling to walk and work with it, until each time, reminded by FATHER),
I often wondered if he paused, slumped his shoulders and breathed a heavy sigh as he humbly uttered the words;
20. O keep my soul, and deliver me: let me not be ashamed; for I put my trust in thee.
21. Let integrity and uprightness preserve me; for I wait on thee. (Psa 25: 20-21)
Despite everything, King David leaned unto the Lord in his darkest moments instead of staying away from Him(like me...like most of us). Despite how alone he felt, David wanted to connect with God and held on to the hope that He was there, even if no one else was.
And this is where we miss it. Because we're misunderstood by people,we simply resigned ourselves to our so-called "fate," that God misunderstands us as well(an aberration,yes, undermining God's Omniscience attribute). Really very dangerous a thing to ever imagine;
It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. (Lam 3: 22)
You see, loneliness can actually be a catalyst to grow our relationship with God rather than stifle it. Loneliness is God’s way of reminding us we were made for a personal relationship with Him, and He placed a deep longing in our hearts only He can satisfy.
Maybe you've this feeling of loneliness because of the loss of a spouse from separation, divorce or even death. Maybe it’s because of an empty nest, an empty spot at the table, the loss of friends, or attending holidays, weddings or social events solo in a new season of life. It can even sometimes feel the strongest when we’re in a crowded room or with a spouse who makes us feel invisible or unimportant even when in their presence, proving loneliness is a state of mind, not a state of a being.
(For me, the latter is the ultimate TRUTH...a state of mind...a negative minded introvert,who because of scars after scars, acquired years after years,believes "NOTHING GOOD CAN COME OUT OF NAZARETH" A lie from the the very depths of the pit of hell)
At this point,we are blinded by our miseries, unwilling to see the devil slowly but decisively trying to scheme us out of God's eternal joy for us;
For I am conscious of my thoughts about you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you hope at the end. (Jer 29: 11)
So,regardless of the root of our loneliness, we can always trust that God is with us. As we lean onto Him, we can continue to pray that He will bring the right people into our lives and satisfy our need for human connection and understanding as He satisfies our soul’s thirst for Him.
AN IMPORTANT ADDITION HERE IS THAT,WE SHOULD ALSO DETERMINEDLY ENDEAVOUR TO MAKE OURSELVES LESS OF A BURDEN TO GOD AND THOSE AROUND US,IN OUR TRYING TIMES... YOU MAY BE SURPRISED I INCLUDED*GOD!* YES, GOD HAS EMOTIONS,JUST LIKE US... REMEMBER,WE ARE MADE IN HIS IMAGE...SO,HE HURTS TOO,WHEN WE MISUNDERSTAND HIM!
Connect with God first, and the rest will eventually fall into place. God may not take away the LONELINESS, but as we put our hope in HIM like David did, GOD will make sure we feel HIS NEARNESS.
Come to me, all you who are troubled and weighted down with care, and I will give you rest. (Mat 11: 28)
Teaching them to keep all the rules which I have given you: and see, I am ever with you, even to the end of the world. (Mat 28: 20)
Join me if you're in the same boat with me;
Lord, I feel so alone right now. Hear my pleas; help me feel Your nearness as You divinely work to impute Your Joy into my life,as you take away the misplaced heaviness in my heart . In Christ Jesus’ Name, Amen.🙇🙏😒!